Taking Care of You

We often allow external factors to affect us internally. What external factors are there you ask? You have stresses from work. There are stresses that come from spouses/significant others. There are family stresses. Big ones, not to say that that the previous examples are not, are the financial stresses. What does stress do to our bodies? Many people overlook the effects of stress, especially the long term effects, due to the fact that life is very busy, we decide to fight through it without really addressing it, or we decide to ignore it with hopes that they go away. Check out these facts on stress discovered on the WebMD website under an article entitled The Effects of Stress on Your Body:

• Forty-three percent of all adults suffer adverse health effects from stress.
• Seventy-five percent to 90% of all doctor’s office visits are for stress-related ailments and complaints.
• Stress can play a part in problems such as headaches, high blood pressure, heart problems, diabetes, skin conditions, asthma, arthritis, depression, and anxiety.
• The Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA) declared stress a hazard of the workplace. Stress costs American industry more than $300 billion annually.
• The lifetime prevalence of an emotional disorder is more than 50%, often due to chronic, untreated stress reactions.

Check out this article by going to: http://www.webmd.com/balance/stress-management/effects-of-stress-on-your-body

The huge problem that some people have faced as it pertains to handling of stress is that some have forgotten how to enjoy life and take time for themselves. I’m learning that you have to be selfish sometimes in order to ensure that you are physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally sound. Your quality of life depends on this. So today take a timeout for yourself and do something for you….no matter how big or how small. Life is too short and each day you wake up it has gotten one day shorter. Healthy eating and exercising, easy-listening music (smooth R&B, easy rock, jazz, classical, Christian, etc.), meditation/yoga, and/or reading and writing are just some examples of ways to handle stresses. Going on walks, going on trips, and/or going to movies are things you can do for yourself just to name a few to remove yourself from stressful situations. Even if it is momentarily any break that comes when stressed can help you. These are things people know that they can do, but often don’t take the time to make them happen. So my question to you as it pertains to how you are dealing with stress in your life is….What are you doing to take care of you?

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What’s your testimony?

Testimonial Thursday: Do you have a testimony? Have you been through the fire and made it out stronger and more determined than ever? Don’t be afraid to tell your story. In fact you should want to tell the world your story of how you overcame whatever struggle, conflict, ailment, and/or challenging situation. Your testimony might be that one thing that will help the next person. People are going through personal struggles this day , most of which they go through alone and what you have to tell may be that one thing that will provide them the courage and strength to fight through it. So tell your story, sing it loud so the world can hear you…because I can almost guarantee that SOMEONE needs to hear it today!

Who is H. M. Trey?

H. M. Trey was born in Statesville, NC and currently resides in Charlotte, NC. He earned his B.A. in Exercise and Sports Science from The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, and his M.B.A. and M.P.A. from Strayer University. Most of his professional career has been spent in the Human Services Field. H. M. Trey has a love for working with kids in the community and being a mentor. H. M. Trey was a part owner of a non-profit organization called Strengthening and Empowering the Lives of our Future (S.E.L.F., Inc.), which had mentoring, tutoring, and sports programs.

H. M. Trey has been writing poetry for many years and has a passion to write, whether it is poetry, music lyrics, or novels. H. M. Trey is a contemporary fiction author and has had two novels published, with a third novel to be published sometime in 2015. In 2008, he set out to write his first novel, with a desire to ultimately become a full-time writer. His debut novel, The Wedding Man, was released in September of 2012. In 2014 H. M. Trey signed as an author with Peace in the Storm Publishing. H. M. Trey’s sophomore novel, Window to the Soul of a man, released October 2014 was his first novel released under Peace in the Storm Publishing. H. M. Trey is currently finishing up work with his third novel, She Will Be Loved. In 2015 H. M. Trey will release She Will Be Loved along with a piece in a nonfictional anthology and H. M. Trey’s first short story.

H. M. Trey lives by what he calls a 3-D Mindset – Determination, Desire, & Drive. With this mindset H.M. Trey is seeking to be that author that is not just known for his writing talents but also for his canny ability to bring his novels to life through the vividness from which he writes.  H. M. Trey is quoted as saying, “Writing is an expression of what’s in your soul. It’s an art form that allows you to paint pictures with the use of words. The beauty of it is that every soul is different so you are able to enjoy many painted pictures from a diverse array of souls through the act of word play. I find joy in writing, whether it is poetry or novel, for it provides me the perfect platform for self-expression”.

Connect with H. M. Trey here:

Peace in the Storm Publishing – http://www.peaceinthestormpublishing.com/

H. M. Trey Website – http://hurleymorgan76.wix.com/h-m-trey

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/pages/HM-Trey/226459717381546?ref=nf

Twitter – https://twitter.com/HMTrey

Instagram – http://instagram.com/hm_trey/#

LinkedIn – www.linkedin.com/pub/hurley-morgan/32/692/a55/

My advice on writing anything that you are aiming to get published ….

The biggest piece of advice is to know your craft or writing style and stay true to it no matter what. My editor gave me some sound advice. She told me that as a writer you should write to your target audience and don’t care what people think about what you write about. Meaning…..some people will talk about your work and try to discourage you. No matter what you will always have someone that will have something negative to say about what you doing no matter what. I have currently two published books and about to have a third book that will be releasing late Spring/early summer of this year. I chose to get an editor to edit my work before I published because it is always good to have another set of eyes to read your work and to be unbiased with critiquing your work before publishing. You always want your best work to be seen by the public, so getting your work edited will show that you are serious about your craft and will ensure that you are not putting out work full of errors. So with that said my advice to any person that wants to write and get there work published:

1. Write from the heart and never fear writing what you want to write.
2. Be leery of publishers and editors that are frauds. There are a lot of fakes out there. Always seek contracts and if possible meet the people face-to-face.
3. Get all work copy written. I send my work to the Electronic Copyright Office to be copy written before I publish to avoid getting work stolen.
4. Never share ideas with just anyone because some people will steal them.
5. Use social networks to connect with other writers. Be a sponge and learn all you can from people who have done it and have been successful.
6. Don’t wait for the “right time” to write a novel. Start your journey now. It’s ok to make errors along the way. That is what editors and writing mentors are for.
7. Research, research, research. Learn differences between traditional publishing and self-publishing. Learn about different publishing companies. Look into the importance of getting book edited by a proven editor.
8. Don’t be discouraged by financial needs in completion. Do things one step at a time. This is where research is important as well. Research all avenues so you will know what you will need financially as it pertains to publishing. Financial needs will vary depending on what you are writing (i.e. novel, poetry).

Be an Anchor

“Relationships: If you put up with it, you’re going to end up with it. Set the standard you want and don’t settle for less” ~ Steve Maraboli

Having the ability to hold someone down doesn’t necessarily mean doing so financially or physically. The best ways to hold that special person down are mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. That’s the type of anchor you want to be first and foremost, especially if you are looking to build a strong, loving relationship. Then…..the other stuff will follow as applicable. What typically happens when the foundation of any relationship is a financial one? Unless it is strictly a business arrangement of sorts, relationships can’t survive on financial grounds alone. Well, maybe if that is the agreement coming in and that is all that the relationship is intended to be on…a financial basis, then possibly it might just work. As we know, as it pertains to relationships, people tend to get emotional ties when involved in relationships and this will even happen when the relationship starts off intending to be on a financial and/or physical basis. Do “friends with benefits” relationships really work? That’s another story for another day, but I will say this. Friends with benefits is a sort of relationship that is based upon the physical and in some cases the financial, so in order for this type of relationship to work out all parties involved must be upfront and honest about what it is that all parties seek from the relationship. If this doesn’t happen, someone will more than likely get hurt if the feelings and/or intentions change.

Now back to the matter at hand…being an anchor. To anchor can be defined as to provide with a firm basis or foundation. In order for relationships to last and grow stronger the basis or foundation must be strong and able to withstand adversity and issues that come within relationships. People often get caught up in trying to please a person physically while in a relationship and will often neglect the glue that hold relationships together, such as mental and emotional connections along with spiritual connections as well. What happens when you grow older? What happens when a person gains weight from stress, pregnancy, or health changes? What happens during disagreements? What happens where things may become a little dull? How do you spice up a relationship? How do you recover from bad arguments? Physical connections alone may not be enough to answer such questions. In my opinion a strong base or foundation in a relationship comes from connections that involve mind, body, and soul with mind and soul helping solidify that relationship. So…how can you be an anchor in a relationship? Mentally…if you look at many surveys it will tell you that people believe mental is more important than physical. Why? Because once you connect with someone mentally you can cause sparks to fly simply through conversation which will lead to the physical heating up. A mental connection helps you better understand a person’s real needs, which ties into the emotional connection. How do you make your significant other happy? How do you make him/her smile? How do you resolve differences without the whole relationship breaking down? That emotional connection helps you understand the Love Languages. Read that book by the way….The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman. It’s a great book that talks about what love languages are and how to understand other people’s love language in relationship to you own. And lastly…you have a spiritual connection. This helps you understand a person’s spiritual beliefs and it will bring you closer together. A true spiritual connection tends to go beyond sharing of superficial values such as interests, hobbies, religion, political views, education, etc. It tends to be deeper matters such as core values, principles, and ways that you view life. Spiritual connections bring you closer and lead you to be more comfortable with each other. A mental, emotional, and spiritual connection helps make the physical connection more powerful. With those connections it is easier to be one another’s anchors.

By: H. M. Trey, Peace in the Storm Author